Is this your 105th graduate job application? Are you muttering words like “team player”, “dynamic” and “good communication skills” in your sleep?
It’s soul-destroying, isn’t it… A rabbit wheel of clichés, and your degree, wit, and intellect – all reduced to keywords and algorithms.
And as for recruitment…? KPI games, high fives at agencies, and short-term sales transactions – with real people and their careers.
It’s a merry-go-round, and it’s absolute BS!
There are millions of job website subscribers and recruitment agencies out there – but it doesn’t have to be like this.
- Do you care about the impact of your work, and how you can better people’s work, careers and lives?
- Can you empathise with people, recognise perspectives, and give a sh*t about customers?
- Would solving business problems and changing people’s careers give you a buzz?
Let’s show the finger to buzzwords, psychometric tests, and corporate claptrap. Let’s leave the data game to the dark world of modern-day politics. Let’s help companies avoid recruitment agencies that charge businesses thousands of pounds for CVs they could have easily accessed themselves.
It must change; it means too much: career moves change lives and effective recruitment changes companies’ futures. There’s another way, and we’re the thought-leaders. Our recruitment is a consultative partnership, right at the top of organisations, digging into what makes them tick:
- Creative job advertising that enhances brands and showcases a business’s purpose
- Tailored, exclusive headhunting assignments for key hires in skills-shortage markets
- Technical, senior and hard-to-fill contract and permanent placements, nationally and globally
This is no pigeon-hole grad role; you’ll chase down, interview, and guide candidates, and you’ll help solve hiring problems for all sorts of interesting businesses.
We’ll guide, train, support and challenge you. Anything that’s easy isn’t worth getting, but we know what it takes to succeed – our top biller joined us as a grad too! We make mistakes, and we expect you to, too. What’s key is that you’ll want to achieve – not just to hit a KPI, but because you care about ‘the why’.
We don’t have set working hours, so forget 9-5, but when you are here, you’ll get monthly on-site massages, yoga, casual office dress, free gym membership, quarterly team socials, and one-to-one appraisals and training.
Who wants to spend most of their week in a cramped sweatbox? Our home is a converted Lace Mill with exposed brickwork, big windows and lots of natural light. And we’re easy to find – just off junction 25 of the M1, in Beeston, and within easy reach of Nottingham and Derby.
If you’re reading this line, it’s a good sign. Apply by emailing email@example.com – with an up-to-date CV free of buzzwords and packed with personality.
Look out for the follow-up email; check your junk folder if necessary. Respond to the questions and tell us all about you, your wackiness, and your savviness.
Salary: £20,000 to £22,000 base plus benefits, flexible working, and commission